Robyn's Secret Passage
It has come to my attention that there are not enough people in the world who know how to be hilarious. Any attempts at humour by such people just end up falling flat.
To remedy this I have come up with a few suggestions as to how you can be really hilarious. Use these often, as they will not grow stale with re-telling.
The Movie Trailer Voice
You know there's a guy with a dark gravelly voice who does the voice overs for a lot of movie trailers? And you know how a lot of movie trailers use the same type of phrases? Well, it's actually really hilarious if you do a silly voice where you pretend to be the trailer voice-over guy and say something that starts off like a regular movie trailer, but has a twist at the end. For example: "He was a man! With a secret! He had HERPES!" See, isn't that hilarious?
What Real Estate Ads Really Mean
We're all familliar with the words and phrases used in real estate ads, and how they are usually used to make properties seem more desirable to potential buyers. Keeping this in mind, a really hilarious thing to do is to make a list of what real estate ads say and what they really mean. For example: "handy man's dream" actually means "falling down old hovel" "bright and sunny" means "there's a great big hole in the roof" and "spacious" really means "there is no truth in advertising and all real estate agents are wankers". Damn, it just doesn't get funnier.
"I Love The Smell Of [noun] In The Morning"
You know in "Apocalypse Now" how Robert Duvall's character says, "I love the smell of napalm in the morning," well that's pretty hilarious on its own. But it can be made even more hilarious! All that's required is to replace "napalm" with another noun. It's even funnier if it's computer-related: "I love the smell of Linux in the morning." or "I love the smell of pixels in the morning." Note: It is not hilarious to say that you love the smell in the morning of such things as coffee or freshly baked bread.
Extra For Experts:
If you are a film maker and want to ad a little bit of a hilariousness to your story, then do a spoof of the bit in "The Matrix" where Trinity jumps up and the camera spins around her in mid-kick. It's funny if the person who jumps up doesn't do it as well as Trinity does it, like if they fall down or pull a funny face. The best bit is the audience will recognise this from "The Matrix" and feel really cool and laugh even louder.